January Journal: Day 2



How do we recreate ourselves? Can we? Do we dare? Is it ever too late?

I resisted buying a new purse for years even though the one I had was too small and too "tweenish," to quote the stylist who was on a mission to help me with my clothes situation last year. I'll leave that story for another time. Suffice it to say, she introduced me to Hue jeggings.

I doubted my ability to know myself enough to know what kind of purse I might like, were I to ever get to a point where I'd be willing to part with my trusty old friend.

And then we fell in love with our our new babysitter and I fell in love with her purse. I was proud of myself for having an opinion on a purse after all these years. I spent a couple nights making a wishlist on the LiveFashionable site, and finally ordered the tote I liked best after conferring with my sister and TJ. The bag came a few days later and boy, did it look cool. But....the zipper was problematic and the stitching on the inside pocket came undone on the very first afternoon I used it, so unfortunately, that was the end of that. I sent the bag back for my money back, but not all was lost. I had gained confidence and hope in my style choice, even if it meant having to reroute.

So here I am, with my new Will purse (thanks to additional research by TJ) and the new earrings I ordered from my friend Shannon's Mango+Main online store. I have a new even-shorter haircut as of two days ago, and my new Tom's (a free replacement for those others that lost their soles) are wearing great. I even have new deodorant.

In so many ways, I look new for the new year. But it is and always will be my interior life that needs the most remaking day after day.

I've made it to Chapter 3 in my Colossians memory work lately, and there is so much "putting on" to be done. We are called to put on the new self; to put on compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience; to put on love above all else.

It's crazy-making for our Make-a-Wishlist-then-One-Click addicted hearts. When we want new, we want it now.

For me, it is a slow transformation of renewing my mind in God's Word daily. I find that the more I give time and attention to Scripture, to reading it, journaling on it, praying with and about it, and especially memorizing it, the more I live into new ways of thinking, and in turn, new ways of being. That's where my heart is finding newness and life these days, where it matters less and less if I look cool, where my new purse and Tom's and earrings and haircut simply decorate this body that houses this soul that longs for eternity and for heaven on earth.